Cover Page

            Permission to speak freely, captain?

 

            Yes, the italicized cover page, the refuge of inane rambles and precocious pitter-posh alike. I feel obligated to point out a few things. First, the cited page numbers refer to the proper numbering within your course pack, not the numbering within the photocopied pages. This is done for your convenience; you’re welcome.

           

I hate the concept of quoting and will argue until I’m blue in the face that it is your responsibility to verify the veracity of my statements, not mine. I would not trust you under any circumstance and the sentiment should be reciprocated. Citations are eye-sores, they sap all enjoyment from the process of reading the text by slicing sentences in half, paragraphs into verses and naturally connected concepts into disjointed fragments with little context. They simultaneously deprive the argument of wholeness and all aesthetic value. With the ubiquity of Google, this approach is becoming obsolete. Nonetheless, they are here for your convenience; indeed, the essay is truly a verifiable plethora of superfluous citations[1], one that will satiate even the most ravenous appetite for Reductio ad BecauseHeSaidSoium. It is somewhat of a satirical approach to the citation, but no so much that it’s invasive. Just enough to get the point across. If you’re not laughing right now, you’re taking this way too fucking seriously.

 

            The essay is a little bit longer than the requirements, but it’s also formatted oddly. As mentioned, there are a lot of quotes. Could I have written the entire essay using pasted pieces of the course texts? YES! I didn’t. I did make it closer to ten pages to make up for the over-quoting.